Contact Me.

The goal in connection is cooperation ✨

Being understood doesn’t always mean someone agrees with you. Sometimes what we’re really asking for is: “Can you understand why this felt the way it did for me?” You can make room for someone’s experience without adopting their interpretation as your own. Attunement doesn’t require agreement. We can be different and still be connected.

If your system adapted around never feeling enough, your body might especially long for experiences of...

Maybe you’re not bad at s3x 🤷🏽‍♀️

When does difference become incompatibility?

We often look at someone’s response and assume it tells us who they are. “They’re avoidant.”
“They’re too much.”
“They don’t care.”
“They’re controlling.”
“They’re overly sensitive.” But a response is not the whole story. My Capacity Methodology looks at the orientation underneath the response: what are you trying to stay connected to, protect, reduce, notice, repair, or understand when something gets activated? Two people can experience the same situation and respond completely differently because their capacity is organizing around different things. And the same person can respond differently depending on their capacity in that particular moment. That’s why I’m less interested in asking,
“What’s wrong with this response?” And more interested in asking,
“What is this response trying to do?” Capacity is NOT personality label.
It’s NOT a measure of how “healthy” you are.
And it certainly is NOT a measure of your worth. It’s a vehicle for understanding yourself with a little more curiosity and a little less shame. What do you tend to orient toward when things get activated? 🧐

I want to give a little shoutout to @studioinspomtl ! ✨ Happy 5th anniversary, Studio Inspo! Thao, Jenn, and Rachel are truly the BEST hairdressers, and I really resonate with their values of bringing community together and creating an inclusive space. They created such a lovely vibe for this celebration, with delicious food, great conversations, and so much fun! It was such a pleasure to facilitate two workshops last night as part of their mental health fundraiser for @amiquebec. We had some really fun conversations, I met some very cool people, and I got to facilitate two short embodiment practices. And for those who are curious: I facilitate Taboo Table Talks on the first Wednesday of each month, hosted at Studio Inspo. It’s a space to talk about the things we don’t always get to talk about: sex, intimacy, relationships, desire, boundaries, and all the messy, funny, complicated, wonderful stuff that comes with being human. And honestly, I love what Studio Inspo creates beyond just great hair. They create a space where people feel welcomed, seen, and part of a community AND folks leave their doors feeling confident and good about their hairstyles. 💛

Validation vs. Agreement ✨

You don’t need to change their minds ✨

One of the most useful distinctions I’ve found in relational work is: A need is not the same thing as the strategy you use to meet it. And this doesn’t mean your strategy is unreasonable, needy, or wrong. It means there may be more than one way to get to the thing underneath it. “I need you to text me every morning.” Maybe what you’re needing is reassurance, consistency, or connection. “I need you to come with me.” Maybe what you’re needing is support, companionship, or help feeling less alone. “I need you to tell me we’re okay.” Maybe what you’re needing is clarity, security, or reassurance. The strategy can be meaningful. But the strategy isn’t necessarily the need. And this distinction matters because when we confuse the two, it can start to feel like: “If you don’t do this specific thing, you’re not meeting my need.” When really, the question might be: “What is this strategy trying to give me?” That doesn’t mean you have to accept every alternative someone offers. Sometimes a particular strategy does matter deeply to you, and you’re allowed to say that. But knowing the difference gives you more information. More choice. More language. And more room for two people to navigate needs together without assuming there’s only one possible route. Needs create direction. Strategies create options. What changes when you start asking yourself: “What is this actually about underneath what I’m asking for?”

What actually is co-regulation?

Understanding doesn’t mean agreeing ✨

If your system adapted around feeling emotionally “too much”, your body might especially long for experiences of...

So, what exactly are the 7 Capacity Profiles™? Each profile describes a core movement your system tends to make when relational load increases. In other words, when a relationship feels emotionally intense, uncertain, close, ruptured, or otherwise demanding, how does your system tend to orient to what’s happening? One person might move toward action → Do something. Another might move toward certainty → Know what will happen. Another might move toward connection → Stay connected to you. Another might move toward reducing intensity → Reduce the intensity. These are not personality types, and they’re not “good” or “bad” ways of responding. They’re different ways a system can organize itself when relational load increases. If you take the Capacity Profile™ assessment, you’ll receive the profile that comes through most strongly in your responses right now. That doesn’t mean it’s the only pattern you have. Our systems are complex, contextual, and can use different strategies depending on the situation, the relationship, and what we have capacity for in that moment. The current version of the assessment is designed to identify one dominant profile. Future versions will capture more of the overlap and interplay between profiles, because I don’t want to flatten a complex human experience into a single box. For now, think of your result less as “This is who I am” and more as: “This is one of the patterns my system may be organizing through right now.” Once we can recognize the pattern, we have more opportunity to understand it, work with it, and build capacity around it. More awareness. More choice. More connection. Take the Capacity Profile™ assessment through the link in my bio. 🧡✨

Today was a BIG DAY! 🥹 I had a booth at my first-ever market, and I’m still on such a high! What a fun experience to see my brand out in the world and in action ✨✨ AND to have so many supportive humans stop by. Thank you. My heart feels so full. 🧡 I’m so excited to see where somatic intimacy coaching takes me next! Today was also the day I spoke on my first panel discussion, and I had so much fun chatting with Debora about What the Body Knows. I tried to record it… but forgot the mics, so you can sort of hear us 😅 And, as if that wasn’t enough, the Capacity Profile Assessment & Lexicon officially launched! 🎉 Head to the link in my bio to take the assessment and receive your free copy of the Lexicon. 🧡 Such a huge milestone for my business, and I’m feeling really proud of myself today. I can’t wait for the next one. ✨!

Resolution vs. Repair

How to stay in connection with self and the person in front you✨

One of the most important distinctions I want us to make when we talk about regulation: Needing support is not the same thing as making someone responsible for your regulation. You are allowed to reach for someone. You are allowed to need reassurance, closeness, touch, grounding, or help finding your next step. And you don’t have to become completely self-sufficient in order to have healthy relationships. The capacity I’m interested in is the ability to stay connected to yourself while reaching toward someone else. To know: This is what I’m feeling. This is what I need. This is what I’m asking for. And you get to decide what you have the capacity to offer. That’s co-regulation. Because capacity isn’t about needing less. It’s about having more choice in what you do with what you need. And honestly, I think this is one of the places where our ideas about “healthy regulation” can get a little distorted. Sometimes regulation doesn’t look like calming yourself down alone. Sometimes it looks like saying: “I’m having a hard time. Will you stay with me while I find my way through it?” That’s relationship. 🤍

Successful conversations don’t always end in agreement ✨

Understanding someone doesn’t mean you’re okay with what happened ✨

If your system adapted around rigid expectations, your body might especially long for experiences of...

We use words like sensual, erotic, turned on, horny, desire, and attraction as though they all mean the same thing… They do not! ✨The erotic is the broader experience of aliveness, charge, captivation, curiosity, vitality, or feeling deeply awake to an experience. It doesn’t have to be sexual. ✨Sensuality is our relationship with bodily sensation and pleasure. A warm bath, music, movement, touch, food, sunlight, something can feel deeply sensual without being sexual. ✨Eroticism is when that charge takes on a sexual or sexualized quality. Sexual tension. Sexual fantasy. Sexual attraction. Erotica. ✨Desire is the wanting. The “I want this.” And here’s where it gets interesting: You can experience the erotic without desire. You can feel deeply alive, captivated, or even sexually charged without wanting to act on it. You can experience sensuality without eroticism. Something can feel incredible in your body without feeling sexual at all. You can experience eroticism without desire. You can feel sexually charged without actually wanting sexual engagement. And you can experience desire without a huge amount of erotic charge. You can want intimacy or sex without feeling fireworks first. None of these experiences makes the others less real. They’re simply different pieces of the experience. And when we collapse them all into “Am I turned on?”, we lose so much information about what our bodies, minds, and relationships are actually telling us. So instead of asking: “Am I sexual enough?” Maybe we can get curious about: What am I actually experiencing right now? Am I feeling alive? Am I experiencing pleasure? Am I feeling sexually charged? Do I want something? And perhaps most importantly: Can I stay connected enough to myself to tell the difference? That, to me, is part of erotic capacity. 🧡 Save this for the next time you find yourself thinking, “Wait… what am I actually feeling?”

Acceptance doesn’t mean you stop wishing things were different ✨

What do you want?

How much S0x should you actually be having?

RESCHEDULING ✨✨✨

Performance vs. Presence

Confidence is not the goal! Expanding your capacity helps you truly feel confident ✨

If your system adapted around being disconnected from the body, your body might especially long for experiences of...

Healing doesn’t always look like moving forward. Sometimes it looks like coming back to the same places. uncertainty. boundaries. conflict. intimacy. desire. yourself. But each time you return, you may meet them differently. You can stay with not knowing without needing to resolve it immediately. You can protect yourself without disappearing or shutting down. You can stay in conflict long enough to find your way toward repair. You can be close to someone without losing yourself. You can notice what you want without immediately overriding it. You can come back to yourself when you’ve drifted away. That’s the spiral of capacity. You don’t become someone who never gets activated, overwhelmed, disconnected, or uncertain. But become capable of returning to yourself with more awareness, more connection, and more choice. Because every time you spiral back, the space to respond becomes a little more available than the impulse to react. ✨

Capacity comes first. We may never even touch the story about your trauma ✨

Healing is not about becoming someone new✨

Why won’t they accept my apology?

An apology isn’t enough.

✨ When your Capacity Collapses and you can’t repair ✨

Having limited capacity can explain your behaviour. However, this doesn’t mean it erases its impact. You can be overwhelmed, dysregulated, or at your limit and still be accountable for what you do next. Accountability doesn’t mean forcing yourself beyond your capacity. It means asking: “Given what I can hold right now, what is the most responsible thing I can do?” Capacity gives us context. Accountability gives us responsibility. #CapacityDistinctions #SomaticHealing #NervousSystem #RelationshipHealth #Accountability

If your system adapted around loneliness, your body might especially long for experiences of...

Okay… I know. This is A LOT. 😂 And if you’re looking at this diagram thinking, “Wait, I’m supposed to keep track of ALL of this while I’m in a relationship?”… NO. Absolutely not. This is a map of a capacity I help clients develop: attentional oscillation. It’s the ability to move your awareness between your internal experience and external reality. Sometimes I need to notice: → What am I feeling? → What is happening in my body? → What do I want? → What is changing inside me? And sometimes I need to orient outward: → What is happening with the other person? → What are they communicating? → What is happening between us? → What information is the relationship giving me? And then importantly… I return. The goal is to develop enough capacity to choose where your attention goes, not to become better at surveillance. And to notice when you’ve become stuck at one end of the continuum. Maybe you disappear into the other person. Maybe you become so internally focused that you lose contact with what’s happening around you. Maybe you bounce between the two so quickly that neither gets your full attention. And the capacity can be practiced. You don’t need to hold every piece of this diagram in your head while you’re having a conversation. You might start with something much simpler: Notice → Orient → Return. What is happening in me? What is happening around me? And what do I notice now? Then we begin again. Because relational presence is in movement. 🧡 This is one of the capacities I help clients explore through somatic relational work. ‘

✨When you don’t want to repair ✨

September is looking FULL in the best way 🧡 I have three opportunities coming up to gather, explore, learn, and reconnect with the body, and I’d love to see you at one (or all) of them. ✨ SEPTEMBER 2 — TABOO TABLE TALK Our intimate conversation circle around s3x, intimacy, desire, relationships, and the things we don’t always get to talk about. We’re almost full ~ only 2 spots left! 📩 DM me if you’d like to join. ✨ SEPTEMBER 13 — BETWEEN INSIGHT & INTUITION I’m bringing my work to a booth for the first time! 🥹 Come find me at The Agora at John Abbott College (21275 Lakeshore Road, Sainte-Anne-de-Bellevue, QC) from 10 AM–4 PM for a day of intuitive readers, holistic practitioners, makers, interactive experiences, and community. AND IT’S COMPLETELY FREE. 🧡 I’ll be sharing somatic tools and resources at my booth, AND I’ll also be joining a discussion panel on embodiment throughout the day. Come curious. Ask questions. Explore what resonates. Leave the rest. ✨ SEPTEMBER 18 — @studioinspomtl 5TH ANNIVERSARY + MENTAL HEALTH FUNDRAISER I’ll be facilitating THREE embodiment workshops throughout the evening: 🕔 5 PM — Reconnecting With Your Body in a Busy World Grounding, nervous system regulation, movement, breath & sensory awareness. 🕕 6 PM — Listening to Your Body Without Judgment An experiential introduction to interoception and learning to notice your body’s signals with curiosity. 🕖 7 PM — Small Practices for Self-Connection Sensuality, sensory awareness, self-touch, breath & everyday embodiment. 🎟️ REGISTER THROUGH STUDIO INSPO: 📩 DM me for the link to join Three different spaces. Three different ways of connecting. Whether you come to talk, explore, learn, feel, or simply get curious,  I’d love to see you this September. 🧡 Save this post, send it to a friend, and come say hi if you see me! #SomaticCoach #Embodiment #SomaticExperiencing #NervousSystemRegulation #BodyAwareness

What does your nervous system do with uncertainty?

Confidence vs. Hypervigilance

Reasons to follow me or unfollow me ✌🏼

You can want something deeply and still not have the capacity for it. And you can have all the capacity in the world for something you don’t actually want. Desire asks: “Do I want this?” Capacity asks: “Can I hold this right now?” Learning the difference can help us stop turning every limit (or every lack of desire) into a problem that needs to be fixed. Sometimes your desire is there and your capacity needs support. And sometimes... you just don’t want it. #CapacityDistinctions #SomaticHealing #NervousSystem #Embodiment #Desire

kinda chic to think good sex starts long before anyone gets naked

🛑✋🏽 Gatekeeping Sacred S3xuality please and thank you!

Your body isn’t resisting ✨

You can’t learn to drive an airplane or a car by simply watching videos and readings manuals… why do you expect relationships to fall into place just because you read a book on healthy relationships or watched over 1000 hours of videos on attachment styles? 👀

When life feels overwhelming, we often look outside ourselves for direction. But your nervous system already has a compass. ✨ Curiosity when you’re ready to explore. 🤍 Connection when you need to be held. 🌿 Rest when your body needs to restore. 🛡️ Protection when safety comes first. 🚧 Boundaries when something important needs protecting. 🌊 Presence when everything feels too far ahead or too far behind. You don’t need every direction all at once. You just need the one your body is asking for today. Which direction are you being pulled toward right now? 🧭

If your system adapted around chronic overwhelm, your body might especially long for experiences of...

One of the greatest myths in healing “Once I know better I should do better”

August Events ✨

Just because a relationship is difficult doesn’t automatically mean you’re incompatible. Sometimes the issue has to do with capacity. You can be deeply compatible with someone and still lack the nervous system resources to sustain the relationship well. And you can have all the capacity in the world for a relationship that simply isn’t the right fit. Learning the difference helps us stop asking, “What’s wrong with us?” and start asking better questions. #CapacityDistinctions #RelationshipHealth #NervousSystem #SomaticHealing #HealthyRelationships

Small business owners thingzzzz

Many of us think we’re reacting to what’s happening. But often, we’re reacting to what our nervous system has learned to expect. The same trigger can create two very different relational loops. 🛡️ One loop is protective.
A trigger leads to protection; protection shapes our behaviour; our behaviour impacts the relationship; we make meaning from that impact (“See? People always leave,” “I’m too much,” “I can’t trust anyone”); and that meaning reinforces the need for even more protection. 🌱 The other loop begins with capacity.
The trigger is still there, but awareness creates enough space to notice what’s happening. From there comes attunement, choice, repair, and the possibility of deeper connection. The goal is to build enough capacity that your triggers no longer have to make your decisions for you. Awareness creates a pause.
And in that pause, a new loop becomes possible. ✨ Which loop do you notice yourself falling into most often?

The Pause You’ve Been Putting Off ✨😮‍💨 A Women’s Circle for slowing down, reconnecting, and coming home to yourself. When was the last time you gave yourself space to simply pause? Not to be productive. Not to take care of someone else. Not to solve the next problem. Just to breathe, reflect, and reconnect with yourself. This evening is an invitation to step away from the constant doing and create space for what often gets pushed aside: your own needs, your own feelings, your own inner voice. Together, we’ll explore: ✨ Gentle somatic (body) practices ✨ Guided reflection ✨ Meaningful conversation with other women ✨ A closing sound bath to rest and integrate No experience needed. No need to be “good” at meditation or embodiment. Come exactly as you are. 📍 @legnomeduvillage 📅 Wednesday, August 26th ⏰ 7:00–9:00 PM 🎟️ $50 + tax A space to pause. A space to reconnect. A space to remember yourself. ✨ Registration link in bio.

Get curious about the longing ✨🤨🧐

If your system adapted around shame, your body might especially long for experiences of...

Choice is often more regulating than calm ✨

Capacity is about giving your body enough lived experience to organize differently ✨🫶🏼

Love and capacity are not the same thing. You can deeply love someone and still not have the nervous system capacity to sustain the kind of connection, repair, or relationship that love requires. This doesn’t mean the love wasn’t real. It means love is one part of the equation. Capacity determines what we can actually hold, express, and practice. Sometimes loving someone means choosing to build capacity together. And sometimes the most loving thing we can do is acknowledge when the capacity for the relationship isn’t there. #CapacityDistinctions #NervousSystem #SomaticHealing #RelationshipHealing #EmotionalCapacity

All jokes aside... 😂 I know how life goes. When things start feeling better, it’s so easy to believe you don’t need support anymore. No judgment. No offense taken. I’ll see you in two months. 🧡

For a long time, I found myself talking about the “mind” and the “body” as though they were separate. And the more I’ve sat with my work, the more I’ve realized... that’s not actually what I believe. The brain is part of the body. Cognition is part of the nervous system. Thinking isn’t the opposite of embodiment. As somatic practitioners, I think we can sometimes overcorrect. In trying to remind people that healing isn’t just cognitive, we accidentally create another false divide. as if the mind and body are competing for importance. THEY’RE NOT . Your nervous system learns in more than one way. One stream helps you make meaning through concepts, language, and understanding. The other helps you integrate through sensation, experience, and repeated lived practice. Knowledge gives us a map. Embodied experience teaches us how to walk the terrain. You can understand boundaries and still struggle to hold one. You can know breathing helps regulate you without your body being able to access it when you’re overwhelmed. Understanding and integration are different forms of learning. The goal of somatic work isn’t to replace cognition. It’s to bring both streams together so what you understand can become something you can actually live. ✨ One nervous system. ✨ Two streams of learning. ✨ Infinite potential for integration.

I’ve been called stubborn for most of my life. Lately, I’ve been wondering if “stubborn” is actually a personality trait... or just a label we use when we don’t understand what someone’s body is protecting. Because when I notice myself digging my heels in, it never feels as simple as “I just want my way.” Sometimes I need more time. Sometimes I’m protecting my autonomy. Sometimes I don’t feel understood. Sometimes I genuinely know something doesn’t feel right, even if I can’t explain why. And sometimes, I simply don’t have the capacity to reorganize around new information in that moment. Those are incredibly different experiences. Yet we often collapse them into one word: stubborn. So this isn’t a post with answers. It’s a field note. A curiosity I’ve been sitting with. What if, instead of asking, “Why am I so stubborn?” we asked, “What might my body be trying to preserve right now?” I wonder how many of the labels we carry are really invitations to become more curious about our nervous systems. What does the word stubborn bring up for you?

✨ TABOO TABLE TALK ✨ Some conversations stay in our heads. Some stay in the group chat. Some get asked to ChatGPT at 11 p.m. What if we talked about them together? After our very first Taboo Table Talk, the biggest piece of feedback was “I didn’t realize how many other women wondered the same things I do.” That is exactly why this space exists. Each month we’ll gather around one thoughtful question and let the conversation unfold naturally. We’ll explore topics around sex, relationships, dating, intimacy, desire, boundaries, communication, and all the wonderfully human experiences that often don’t have a place to be spoken out loud. There are no lectures, no expectation to have the “right” answer, and no pressure to share. Whether you’re someone who jumps right into conversation or someone who mostly listens, you belong here. 🗓️ Wednesday, August 5th, 2026 🕢 7:30–9:15 PM 📍@studioinspo, Pointe-Claire Village 🎟️ Tickets are available through Eventbrite (link in bio). If you’d rather skip the Eventbrite service fees, you’re also welcome to reserve your spot by sending me an e-transfer or paying cash at the door. Just send me a message so I know to save you a seat. Come curious. Leave feeling less alone. 🧡

If your system adapted around emotional neglect, your body might especially long for experiences of...

The body and brain have two different processing languages. It’s not that the body is slower, it’s just different 🤷🏽‍♀️ And it’s up to us to learn our bodies language 🧡

Activation ➡️ Repair ➡️ Connection

Activation ➡️ Shame ➡️ Disconnection

The Capacity Lexicon ™ ✨🧡 Orientation🧡✨

Me preparing for the Netflix documentary about how we accidentally turned nervous system regulation into another form of self-improvement...

✨ Notice when you recover faster ✨

If your system adapted around control or unpredictability, your body might especially long for experiences of...

Repair is the real accelerator of capacity ✨

People often wonder why s3x and money can evoke such similar feelings in the body. It’s tempting to think it’s because they’re both “taboo.” But I think it goes deeper than that. Both invite us into moments of exchange. Receiving. Negotiating. Setting boundaries. Expressing desire. Asking for what we need. Risking disappointment. Risking rejection. Risking being misunderstood. From a somatic perspective, I don’t believe our nervous systems are primarily asking, “Is this about s3x or money?” They’re asking: Do I still have choice? Can I say no? Is it safe to receive? Will I still belong if I advocate for myself? Can I stay connected to myself while I’m in this exchange? Whether we’re discussing intimacy, asking for a raise, charging for our work, splitting the bill, or expressing a sexual desire, our bodies are often responding to much older experiences of connection, safety, and belonging. This is why two people can have the exact same conversation about money or s3x and leave with completely different experiences. It’s not just about the topic, it’s about the capacity each nervous system has to stay present within it. The goal isn’t to eliminate discomfort. It’s to gently expand our capacity to remain connected to ourselves while navigating the conversations that matter most. Because the conversation is rarely just about money. And it’s rarely just about s3x. It’s about what those moments ask of our nervous systems. ✨ Which feels more vulnerable for you right now: talking about money or talking about sex?

Capacity Distinctions™ ✨🧡 Capacity vs. Willingness 🧡✨

If your system adapted around abandonment, your body might especially long for experiences of...

The Capacity Lexicon™ ✨🧡 Capacity 🧡✨

Taboo Topics S3x & Money ✨

Capacity is returning! Not never leaving regulation ✨

If your system adapted around feeling invisible, your body might especially long for experiences of...

Pleasure expands capacity too ❤️

Healing is not becoming unactivated ❌

This is one of the foundational distinctions from The Capacity Lexicon, a living language I’m developing to help us understand ourselves and our relationships with more compassion, nuance, and embodied choice. 💬 I’m curious: Have you ever mistaken your capacity for your worth? #CapacityLexicon #RelationalCapacity #NervousSystem #SomaticPractice #EmbodiedIntimacy

Activation often leads to shame + withdrawal ✨

Getting robbed but you’re a somatic intimacy coach 😂

Your mind can understand something long before your body experiences it as true. You might know you’re worthy of love. You might know your partner isn’t your past. You might know you’re safe to speak up. And yet your body still tightens, hesitates, or prepares for danger. This is your nervous system doing exactly what it learned through experience. Cognitive learning helps us make meaning. Embodied learning helps us detect safety. Both matter. Insight can open the door, but repetition, compassionate practice, and safe relational experiences are often what allow that insight to become embodied. Healing isn’t about collecting more information. Sometimes it’s about giving your body enough experiences to believe what your mind already knows. ✨ Where have you noticed the difference between knowing something and truly feeling it in your body?

Capacity is not staying calm ✨

The Anatomy of Extraction Part 8

People sometimes think they are regressing when actually they are becoming more aware!

If your system adapted around not being seen, your body might especially long for experiences of...

The Anatomy of Extraction Part 7

Tolerance vs. Resilience vs. Capacity

What does capacity feel like in the body?

The Anatomy of Extraction part 6

The Anatomy of Extraction Part 5